Here are seven ways to incorporate “couple’s care” together, as recommended by self-care experts: “You can work on setting your goals together, or set them separately and then share,” says certified life coach Melissa Snow. “This invites conversation about what they are excited about, what their fears are, and how you can help.” When your partner is involved in your personal development, you’ll feel that much more connected to each other and able to understand each other in much deeper, more nuanced ways. “Learning something new is fun, and it also keeps the brain active,” says mindset coach Melissa Wolak. “When you share a project together as a couple, it cultivates teamwork but also an experience where you can learn together, create something new, and you laugh at mistakes.” “Reading provides new intellectual stimulation and a conversation topic outside of work and home life,” said Wolak. “On the cognitive side, reading, remembering the details, and discussing the book together are great brain exercises.” And just imagine how sweet it is to read in bed with your partner. Whether a staycation, weekend getaway, or monthlong backpacking stint across Europe, life coach Vicky Shilling recommends physically writing down the plans and brainstorms in a notebook to make them more of a reality. “Many of us learn and are stimulated visually and absorb information much better when it’s visually presented,” she says. “Keeping a notebook with your plans will ensure you’re both creating the holiday you want, seeing a combined plan of where you’ll be going and what you’ll be doing so no one is disappointed. Writing down your brainstorms also means you’re not going back to square one every time you discuss it!” Shilling also adds that keeping your notes will be a great memento, which you can build into a travel journal or scrapbook after your trip. Pick a time, either early morning or just before bed, to sit as a couple and breathe or meditate together. Feeling this stillness as one is powerful. Beheshti recommends a back-to-back position, which allows couples to easily synchronize their breathing because of the physical contact. “Regardless of whether you have a dog to exercise, getting outside together is an ideal opportunity to combine exercise and fresh air,” said Karen Tindall, a certified life coach in Arkansas. “It creates a time when you can have undistracted conversations away from technology and prying ears of family.” While many people keep gratitude journals, it’s more commonly an individual practice. But why not share this beautiful habit with your partner? Adding this to your regular routine allows for the chance to communicate with your partner in a sometimes vulnerable way. Marriage and family therapist Erica Basso recommends writing down three things you love about your partner and three things you’re grateful for that you’ve noticed them do recently; then share them with your partner to turn that gratitude into a shared experience. You can do this weekly or even daily. Everyone needs a little self-care in their week, and bringing your partner into these practices can be a great way to not only share these benefits with another person but to create the added bonus of creating intimacy—which is itself something that will improve your well-being. So the next time you’re carving out a date night, consider incorporating activities that do both: allow for a sense of closeness and personal wellness.
