The answer? You’re calling out to them through your energy. We attract at our common level of vibration, or frequency, which is expressed in the simplest terms as our level of self-love or self-abandonment. Low-frequency people attract other low-frequency people, while high-frequency people attract other high-frequency people. When you break it down, this makes sense intuitively: People who are generally happy and peaceful (high-frequency people) are not attracted to people who are often anxious or depressed (low-frequency people). Likewise, low-frequency people might feel intimidated or threatened by high-frequency people. The law of attraction states that like attracts like, so in relationships, this means that like frequency attracts like frequency. Assuming we can easily cut out the unhealthy diet with a little bit of conscious effort, it’s the psychological behaviors that we need to spend time understanding to figure out how they’re negatively affecting our energy. How are you abandoning yourself? Do you identify with any of these four behaviors? However, now as adults, ignoring your feelings is a form of self-rejection, just like if you ignore a child’s feelings, the child will immediately feel alone and rejected. You might want to think of your feelings as your inner child. Your inner child becomes anxious, depressed, or angry when you ignore them, and this self-rejection will lower your frequency. When you are loving yourself by learning how to take full responsibility for your happiness, sense of safety, and self-worth, your frequency is high—meaning you’ll attract other people who already love themselves, too. Loving yourself means embracing and learning from your feelings rather than ignoring them. All of your feelings have vital information for you regarding whether you are taking care of yourself and whether others are being kind or uncaring. Loving yourself means doing kind actions on your own behalf, rather than expecting others to do this for you. You heal your self-judgments when you tune in to the truth of who you really are and learn to treat yourself as the incredible soul you are. To attract a loving and available partner, you need to become the kind of person you want to attract. When your energy frequency is low—no matter what is causing it—you’ll attract other people whose frequency is also low in some ways. But likewise, the more you can inject your life with positivity—the kind that’ll make your energy vibrate with joy—the more you’ll also attract people whose energy is moving just like yours is. Together, you can create a cycle of good vibrations.